Last Day of 2019

Today has been a very busy day.  I decided to work a double because let’s face it the hospital bills are nasty big and not going away.  So I am back to working two or more overtime shifts for a while.  Today I don’t know if it was good fortune or a potential oh shit, but the home I started at 16 years ago is in dire need of help and I said I would try a O.T. shift or two there and see how it goes.  It will be good see my original guys again.

The last day of 2019 and it has been snowing pretty much all day.  Looks beautiful out, but not fun to drive in.  I am only off for eight hours before I am due back in tomorrow, but I want to bring in the New Year with my family.  We all will probably already be sleeping, but at least we will be together.

Today is my oldest brother’s birthday and if my memory is correct he is 58 today.  Which of course he doesn’t look.  He has always looked younger than what he really is.  I wished him a very Happy Birthday and sent him my love.

On the last day of the year people are talking about resolutions and big changes.  I use to do that too.   Then I realized with big lofty goals I was just setting myself up for failure.  So the only thing I am asking from myself is to keep moving in a positive direction in 2020.  Baby steps are fine and mistakes are going to happen but as long as I am making positive changes I feel good about then why not.

This is what I look look today.  Notice there is no makeup or hair dye just me.  I have become comfortable and happy with this version of me.  I expect I will be more grey and have more wrinkles that you will be able to see at the end of 2020 and that’s ok.  Because right now at the of 2019 I have lived through some serious shit this year.  Cried major tears and suffered big losses.  At the same time I have loved deeply.  Family, my beautiful friends, my Soul Mate of 23 years and my furry babies.

Hell yes 2019 has been rough and yes I am hoping for a better 2020, but whatever comes my way I will handle it I hope in a positive manner.  Let’s make some Mother Fucking Lemonade out of some lemons.

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