And I am sitting up in my bed with pillows behind me waiting for the muscle relaxer and pain pill to kick in.
Sometime either late Monday night or early Tuesday morning I rolled over in my bed and heard a pop. I felt immediate pain in my shoulder. I fell back to sleep but when I woke up I couldn’t move my neck and I had severe shoulder blade and boob pain on the right side.
I took a couple pills and went to work because that’s what I do. I go to work and I work through the pain. Then I come home and try to rest bit.
This morning I woke up and it’s better, but not great. We went to doctor appointments and I went to work. I did what I needed to do and then I came home to rest.
I understand that’s some things need to be done and I try my best to get them done. I deal with aches and pains because that’s just part of life. But every once in awhile my panties get bunched when I hear people tell me about how difficult their jobs are and they’re tired all the time and I have no idea what they’re going through.
While it’s true I have no idea what another person is going through but that’s a two-way street. I do know that particular individual works a job where they sit a computer, have scheduled breaks and lunches. They have a set schedule and they work 40 hours a week.
So I smile and I nod with the correct amount of compassion. Inside I’m going you self-centered mother fucker. Rarely do I work 40 hours a week. I don’t get to sit down on my ass to do my job. I don’t get scheduled breaks or lunches, which means sometimes I don’t eat until 8 at night. And I missed out on a whole lot of stuff because I don’t have a set schedule.
So I stop and take a few deep breaths and I start looking at things from another perspective. The what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger side of things. I start to feel lucky, strong, and Independent. I also know that if something happened and my whole life changed tomorrow I could roll with it because every single day I just roll with it.
I’m not even sure where I was going with this entry and that could be because of the pain pills. I guess it comes down to life is hard for everybody and I have the choice of being compassionate and going on with my life or being a douche. I think I’m going to go with compassionate. We seem to have a lot of douches out there.